Sometimes you don't have a car. Sometimes you get a DUI. Or your "girlfriend" bails and you're too proud to ask your buddies for a ride. Or you don't have a girlfriend, but a girl you'd like to fill the role and SHE bails on you. Regardless of the reasons, you're walking from the river tonight.

It starts out easy enough. You go past others who, like you, are going from point A to point B, no matter how not-straight that may be. You go out past the tributaries and familiar buildings, and it's about here that you are faced with a choice: to get shot or not get shot.

Naturally, you take the high road.

You cross the bridge (which takes about 15 seconds to traverse via car... or 7 minutes in your case) and arrive at the stretch of row-homes and cars on cinder blocks. This isn't to say that row-homes are in some way negative. You have to take into effect if there are nefarious characters afoot... if said row-homes are taken care of properly, and if said cinder blocks look legit or possibly from a decaying building nearby. This where you go when you don't want to get shot.

Everyone here is there for a purpose, like you. Beats and booms blast from open windows. Gentlemen on couches placed (left?) on sidewalks stare at you... you're headphoned head jolts up, then down slightly. They follow, much like a yawn (for more on yawns: :http://www.mnn.com/earth-matters/animals/stories/chimpanzee-study-reveals-why-yawning-is-contagious).

Luckily it's only two more miles home.

You get into familiar territory and the journey suddenly becomes so much harder, and not just because of the rain. You have to sneak into your house without appearing to be TOO intoxicated. It's a good thing you walked almost 5 miles or you may still be enjoying the night. That j helped too.

Fire up that 360 and start goin to town on some motha fuckers.